I put the 'Fun' in Funeral

The blogger in me slowly dies just like a fly who had a puff of baygon. Nothing interesting to write, lack of motivation or simple laziness, can't say exactly what weird ailment i have. Nothing much happening lately in my life...oh yea, i nearly met with an accident. A fast car collided with the small bricks that separates the lane , drifted a few hundred meters on the wet road, the tyres were screeching and there were sparks all over the place. It was like a scene from 'fast and furious Tokyo drift' right in front of my very eyes. I hardly moved or blinked an eye as the car went past me. Maybe it could have hit me, or hit another car that would hit a truck carrying logs of wood that would roll on the streets hitting an electric pylon causing live wires to make contact with the wet road, transmitting the electricity to my body through the myelinated fibres of my spine and making shish khebab with my brains and giving me nice new spiky hair in the process (that could be the script for final destination 5!). However, i was a bit disappointed since my life did not flash in front me in black and white at that very moment. I wonder what would be the first thing that would flash in my mind. Boobies, food, loved/hated ones...hmm hard to know. Death...If i blog about death, people would start to think I'm suicidal or depressive and blabla because of the past events in my life. I'm fine, thank you for not asking and the only suicidal thought i had during the last few weeks was when i had to go to hospital at 8 in the morning, climb the stairs till the 8th floor only to be told that there were no classes. I kinda feel weird about death, or about people dying around me. Don't know if it is because i have seen so many dead bodies, but death for me has become so trivial.

A recent survey stated that the average person's greatest fear is having to give a speech in public. Somehow this ranked even higher than death which was third on the list. So, you're telling me that at a funeral, most people would rather be the guy in the coffin than have to stand up and give a eulogy.

If I die anytime soon, please look for some traces of my DNA on the tissues found in my dustbin to revive me when cloning becomes legal; also i would like to give all my belongings- i.e my computer- to my room mate, please format the hard disk and delete all folders named x :); also i would like to give him custody of my beloved hamster -Chapong. Take good care of him/her. I still don't know if its a he or a she.(n.b: If anybody knows how to recognise the sex of hamsters please leave a comment). Will i just disappear completely or will people still talk about me for centuries- just as Achilles (yea, i've just seen Troy again!). Anyhow, my blog will still be here as a testimony to my existence; i will be immortal in my own way.

Top 10 causes of death at the computer:

10.) CD's were used for a game of frisbee and were found to be too sharp for this purpose.

9.) Died of old age while waiting for a webpage to load.

8.) Died of starvation while waiting for online-ordered meal to arrive.

7.) Went mad trying to understand computer manual.

6.) Computer exploded due to overload of spam and junk mail.

5.) Died of poverty after making the mistake of trying to keep their computer up-to-date.

4.) Bought a mega-hyper-gigaforcep-gerpatologicatron and were never seen again.

3.) Attempted to wire up everything in their house and died of sever burns while trying to flush the toilet.

2.) Tried to design a computer mouse that resembled a real mouse (ate cheese, ran around, squeeked and bit) and died in the process of varied causes.

1.) Commited suicide with frustration after trying to make sense of windows vista.